Well… hello there. Yes, it’s been a while.
My absence might imply otherwise, but all of you were genuinely on my mind. Well, okay, most of you, the ones I know I can count on to read this blog. No, I haven’t been following your blogs, because that would require logging onto the website, and logging on would require me to face the fact that I have been derelict in my blogging duties. So, while thinking of you all and brainstorming my glorious return to blogging (this post will probably be less than glorious… I hate to bear spoilers, just trying to curb the expectations), even road mapping my inevitable return to Eclectic Camel, it was still far away in a sense; it wasn’t something I had to bear the responsibility for just yet.
I don’t know if you realize it, but there is a responsibility of sorts every time we start to type in the empty field titled New Post, that first letter, first word, first paragraph and CREATE prior to publishing whatever brain baby we gave birth to. It’s that same responsibility we bear every time we let someone into our lives, and no, I don’t think that responsibility is less because we’re speaking to a faceless audience. Vulnerability begets vulnerability, and our words bear more weight with others than we realize. We’re always looking for those similar wavelengths that resonate in our hearts; I think that’s why we blog and why we look to what others have to say on topics that resonate with us. It’s those little moments of common ground that make life meaningful.
The note I left things on was “how do we move forward when the drive simply isn’t there?” I broached the topic, the question was asked, but… hell if I know. I feel responsible for an answer, but I don’t know that I have any. Could I really avoid the question and dive back into discussing comic books or games? I don’t know that I could do so and not feel I was being more irresponsible than I did about my brief absence. Can you really develop a process for motivation? Is there 7 steps for connecting to your own heart and purpose? I’ve walked the paths others have suggested, and I’m finding more and more that our Paths genuinely are unique. If I ever write a motivational book, I will likely title it “Go Write Your Own GD Book!”
There are questions of self identity I can’t answer for you. I’m still trying to figure out who I am, so I can’t tell you who you are. I know for a fact I have written a very similar piece, but I am deliberately not referencing it. I’m going to make this purely about where I am right now.
1.) Life isn’t for the timid. Some who know me might find it hard to believe I hold any value in propriety, but I actually do hold a lot of weight in the right and wrong way to deal with people. Consideration can be taken to the wrong extreme, however, and I am increasingly convinced that we absolutely have to take what belongs to us. There really is no way around it. Nobody is going to come along and hand it to you; in fact, I wouldn’t trust anything that comes too easily. We are afraid to excel and we’re afraid to step into our rightful places because we feel we need to be apologetic about it. Let the plebeians worry about false modesty; fools take by forfeit what the modest fail to claim by right. I think sometimes I subconsciously wait for a magical door to open, but I don’t believe inaction or timidity is ever rewarded.
2.) You have to believe you are capable of meaningful change. I don’t think self identity ever precedes self worth. I think you have to know that you are valuable and you are capable before you know why. That sounds backwards, I admit, but until we believe there is purpose surrounding our lives, I don’t think we can start to dig deep and discover the specifics about who we are and what we were meant to do. Self identity certainly enriches our self worth, but you have to believe that regardless of handicap, you can bring value into your immediate world. I think that identity can shift as we take on new roles, but that underlying sense of value is what sustains us.
3.) Your life has as much meaning as you invest in it. Next time you find yourself caring a bit too much about white picket fences and 2.5 kids, start concerning yourself more with how you’re interacting with your world because you have a unique place in it. Because, really, if you’re living to see what the world can bring you, you’re not even going the right direction. Put your big boy / big girl pants on and look around you. Those opportunities you see are more important than your career choices, family decisions, etc. because they puts all of those things into perspective. That is where the richness is.
4.) Live holistically. Don’t neglect your physical / emotional / spiritual / mental health. Eat better. Drink water. Read more. Go for walks. Pray / meditate. Listen. Give generously. Get the “junk food” out of your life; hobbies are fine, as long as they don’t become defining. (I’m horribly guilty of this, unfortunately.) This is really a very basic concept, but neglecting one area can downward spiral the rest of your life. If you aren’t sure where to begin, begin by bringing these areas back in balance by simply considering them, if nothing else.
This blog, you see, is all of those things for me. This is me exercising my mental and emotional health, and this is my gym, this is where I can pump myself up, remind myself that I’m a BAMF and maybe remind a few others that they’re pretty significant too. It’s my way of reaching out and remembering that part of my emotional and spiritual health is always pressing OUT my sphere of influence, even if for the moment, it just means typing out a blog. These things can manifest in your life in ways that are more meaningful for you, but I’m rooting for you, if that helps any.
Oh, and I’m sorry I don’t have a stupid (and completely irrelevant) cat picture to tack onto this. I forgot some of the finer points of marketing a blog, I guess. MUST STOCK FUNNY INTARWEBS PICTURES. I’ll post one next time, promise.